Last month, I turned 21.
I wouldn't normally think that this was that big of a deal. I mean, age is a just a number and all that. But this year feels significant. Different.
For one thing, I have just one year of college left before I graduate. And I honestly can't wait to do just that. I'm done with the psuedo-summer camp weirdness. I'm done living in the middle of nowhere. And I'm really done with people whose priorities are the exact opposite of mine.
I will miss the classes, though. I really do like class, and discussions, and theses. But I don't like getting up early for class, so. Silver lining.
Aside from being totally done with the college thing, I moved to Manhattan this summer for my first big-girl, real-life job too! After one day here I was already like, do I have to go back to school in the fall? And now that I'm settled into my internship (my documentary filmmaking internship! I can't believe it myself!), I feel like I could stay here, doing this, forever.
I guess that's a good thing, since I know what I want to do and where I want to be after graduation. But, man, I'm really dreading the months of school in between.
I've always known that I would freakin' love being an adult. And I really do. I don't have all of the responsibilities of adulthood yet, but I'm thinking about those things. And, strange as it may seem, I'm looking forward to them.
I don't care if that's weird. I'm discovering that a large part of adulthood is knowing that you're weird, accepting those parts of you, and embracing them as truly the best bits.
Although my day-to-day life is so unfamiliar now, it doesn't feel strange or uncomfortable. It feels right, and real. I didn't realize how unreal high school and parts of college felt. How inconsequential. Now that I'm doing things that I care about, with people that I care about, in this incredible place that I love from the deepest, most bizarre crevices of my odd little heart, all that crap from the past doesn't matter.
What's more important than family, passion, and loving who you are and where you are? The answer is literally nothing. Not boys, not selfish jerks, not flabs and jiggles, not cool hair and white sneakers.
With all that said, I'm still having a hard time accepting going back to school in the fall. It was my first love, once. New York City may be the place I want to grow old with, but college definitely helped me become the kind of person who thrives here. I just need to keep reminding myself of that, I think. Maybe I only think that I'm ready to move on, but there are a couple of lessons I have left to learn. Yeah, I like that. Yeah.