If you're a Weekly Playlist To lover, you have probably noticed that I have a thing for old music. Like, really old music. Like, 1920s-1950s. Not music from the 80s, which, even though 37 years ago feels like forever ago (I definitely wasn't born yet), I don't consider old.
I'm an old music snob.
So this week I decided it might be fun to try something new. Despite my self-diagnosed snobbery, I also love the more current tunes. Typically I don't believe that ranking things ever works - I'm a fan of the "my favorite things exist in tiers, not ranks" philosophy - but hey, why not try?
The following playlist is comprised of one old song paired with a comparable-ish new song, all under the umbrella of ~love~. I'll tell you which one I think is better for each pair, and I would love to know which ones you prefer, too!
Maybe I could even get one comment? Just one? Yeah, yeah, you're right. That's way too crazy.
Without further ado, let the love song battle of the ages BEGIN.
(Oh, right-- and the whole playlist can be listened to here!)
I WALK THE LINE - Johnny Cash
JOHNNY & JUNE - Heidi Newfield
This one isn't even fair. There was no way I was picking anything over Johnny Cash. Although Newfield's song is a cute little modern interpretation of the greatest love story of all time (Johnny Cash and June Carter-- just look it up) the real deal will always surpass the store brand.
BUTTON UP YOUR OVERCOAT - Ruth Etting
CRAZY IN LOVE - Beyoncé
This one was a bit tougher than the previous. Beyoncé, despite being rather contemporary, is totally classic. If I had inserted a more recent Beyoncé song, like one off of Lemonade, this battle of the ages would've totally gone to her. But as it is, "Button Up Your Overcoat" is just too freaking cute. I mean, "Wear your flannel underwear / When you climb a tree"? I don't understand it but I love it.
AS TIME GOES BY - Dooley Wilson
RIGHT THRU ME - Nicki Minaj
I made this too hard on myself. Now I have to pick between one of my all-time favorite songs, which is also my parent's wedding song and the song from goddamn Casablanca, and Nicki Minaj. I feel so guilty right now. I love Nicki. But "As Time Goes By" is truly timeless and romantic and beautiful and I just, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
A SUNDAY KIND OF LOVE - Ella Fitzgerald
EARNED IT - The Weeknd
I did this to myself. God, I love both of these songs. This is why I go by the tier method! It's too impossible to choose! First of all, this was a weird coupling on my part. What is similar about this songs? On one hand, Ella Fitzgerald. On the other hand, "Earned It" is so hot. You know you agree with me. Girl Unaffiliated is a no-judgment blog. I might have to use my one pass on this one (I'm writing this so I can change the rules ok).
CHEEK TO CHEEK - Fred Astaire
R U MINE? - Arctic Monkeys
Remember before, when I said that I'm an old song snob but I also like current music? Well, I'm questioning everything now because, so far, I have only picked the old song counterpart and I'm about to do it again. So, yeah, this one was easy. "Cheek to Cheek" all the way. Although "R U Mine" is preferred in certain contexts, I think overwhelmingly I would choose the former first.
BUONA SERA - Louis Prima
RADAR DETECTOR - Darwin Deez
How did I not see this coming? Again, I'm choosing the first song. "Buona Sera" just gets me hyped. "Radar Detector" is super cute, though. I also recommend that one.
IT HAD TO BE YOU - Billie Holiday
SOMEONE LIKE YOU - Adele
I wonder how many weddings use Adele songs for the ceremony/first dance without really realizing that they're more like break-up songs. With that said, this one seems obvious since "It Had to Be You" is so much more romantic. At the very least, it's not totally heart-wrenching.
YOU'VE REALLY GOT A HOLD ON ME - Smokey Robinson
LOVE ON THE BRAIN - Rihanna
I actually quite like "Love On The Brain" so this song fisticuffs is tough. Oh, man, I would really like to pick a newer song at least once throughout this whole thing, but I can lie to neither myself nor my readers! It's Smokey Robinson all the way.
I ONLY HAVE EYES FOR YOU - The Flamingos
FADE INTO YOU - Mazzy Star
Hmm. Hmm. I think I might actually be a little unpredictable here and go for "Fade Into You." It's definitely a little bit of an unusual love song, but, for me personally, quite a bit more realistic: "I think it's strange you never knew" is the title of the memoir I could write about my romantic mishaps.
Well, here we are. I picked all of the old songs, barring the one I needed to use my pass for and the very last battle. So actually not all but whatever, I'm rounding up. I'm just such a little old-souled hopeless romantic. Here I am. This is me. Am I proud? No. Am I ashamed? Also no. What can you do?
Don't forget to take a listen to the entire playlist here and let me know which song you would pick!
You know how some people really care about the environment? So they recycle, and they share Facebook articles about climate change denial, and make their own deodorant or something. I'm sort of like this. But not for the environment, or any other such worthy cause. I'm an advocate for cutting people out of your life.
To me, cutting people out of your life is as refreshing and frequent as spring cleaning. It's like digging through your closet, finding an ugly shirt that you never wore which probably still has the tags on it and was buried under your childhood snow pants, and thinking, "Does this spark joy?!" and then unceremoniously throwing it out. (I tried reading that famous self-help book about cleaning and sparking joy but nothing really stuck except for the phrase "spark joy" which sparks joy in me whenever I use it.)
However, people cannot be thrown out in the same manner as old, useless, or unwanted belongings. Usually, you still have to see them, and maybe even interact with them. This is one of the downsides of cutting people out of your life.
Listen. I get it. It is possible that I write people off too quickly. This is something that I have considered. I can be a bit cold when I feel like someone has sacrificed something I believe in for something that I don't believe in. But is this not why people have values in the first place? So that they can live up to them? Stand up for them?
That's what I think, anyway. I'd much rather be lonely for a little while than look the other way when someone has done something wrong.
If someone is bringing hurt, pain, and general weirdness to your life instead of support, understanding, and goodnatured wackiness, you have Girl Unaffiliated's complete permission, in writing, to cut them off without feeling bad.
Take care of yourselves, people. Sometimes that means being by yourself for a second. Don't be scared. It has basically been scientifically proven that learning to be your own BFF is way more important than staying in a crappy friendship or relationship that has ceased serving you as a spiritual, magical human being.
Believe me, I know how hard it is. (Am I being preachy? Ugh.) All wounds will heal, as long as you stop letting bitches pour salt into them.
Listen to this fabulously eclectic and positivity-affirming thirty-minute playlist here!
1.You Keep Me Hangin' On - The Supremes This song brings up a potential issue in ending friendships or relationships-- as soon as people don't have you in their lives anymore is when they realize just how badly they still want you around. Of course, depending on the situation, this doesn't feel as nice as you might think it would. To me, wanting what you can't have is not cute.
Why do you keep coming around playing with my heart?
Why don't you get out of my life and let me make a new start
Let me get over you the way you've gotten over me
2.Keep It To Yourself - Kacey Musgraves One of my all-time favorite singers, Kacey has no shortage of songs to make you simultaneously laugh and tear up a little bit. (I think I need that emoji.)
You heard from your friends
That I'm doing okay
And you're thinking that maybe you made a mistake
And you want me to know
But I don't want to know
How you're feeling
3. Go Your Own Way - Fleetwood Mac Sometimes it feels like losing someone is worse than losing yourself. It's not.
Isn't the right thing to do
How can I ever change things
That I feel
4. Breakin' Up - Rilo Kiley A gentle yet pop-y reminder that the earth stills turns, even when something crappy happens (unless of course the crappy thing that happened is that the earth stopped turning).
It's not as if New York City
Burnt down to the ground
Once you drove away
It's not as if the sun won't shine
When clouds up above
Wash the blues away
5. These Boots Are Made For Walking - Nancy Sinatra This song is kind of silly but it really pumps me up when I need that extra "boss bitch who doesn't care what anyone thinks" jolt, which is, like, all the time.
You keep lyin' when you oughta be truthin'
You keep losing when you ought not bet
You keep samin' when you oughta be changin'
What's right is right but you ain't been right yet
These boots are made for walking
And that's just what they'll do
6. I Feel Better - Frightened Rabbit Unfortunately, this is exactly how healing from bullshit works. It sucks, and then you're great! And then it sucks again. And then it's the worst thing ever. But then you're feeling okay. And then you're feeling a little better than okay. And then you're fan-frickin-tastic!
I feel better and better and worse and then better
Than ever, than ever, than ever
I feel much better and better and worse and then better
Than ever, than ever, than ever, than ever
7. Are You Sure - Kacey Musgraves featuring Willie Nelson I normally don't double-up artists in these playlists, but Kacey is just that good. Also, this is actually a Willie Nelson song that they reworked to cover together. And man, this is truly one of my lifetime favorite songs. Listening to it feels like walking through a film, sepia-toned and heart wrenching and soft and slow.
Look around you
Look down the bar from you
At the lonely faces you see
Are you sure that this is where you want to be?
These are your friends
But are they real friends
Do they love you as much as me?
Are you sure that this is where you want to be?
8. Vice - Miranda Lambert For some reason this is the song that I listen to on constant repeat when I have an essay to write for class. Why? I don't know, but I've done pretty damn well on every essay I wrote while listening to it so it's possible that I've really discovered something here!
Maybe I'm addicted to goodbyes
Another vice, another town
Where my past can't run me down
Another life, another call
Another bed I shouldn't crawl out of
At 7 AM with shoes in my hand
Said I wouldn't do it, but I did it again
And I know I'll be gone tomorrow night
9. Take A Bow - Rihanna This song brings back some serious summer in the 2000s realness. Thank you, Rihanna. You should take a bow.
Don't tell me you're sorry 'cause you're not
Baby when I know you're only sorry you got caught
But you put on quite a show
You really had me goin'
But now it's time to go
Curtains finally closing
10. Smile - Lily Allen I love this song because it sounds so happy and you're bopping along to it and then you realize that it's smiling at someone's misfortune. And then you think about it for a second, maybe feel guilty, but ultimately shrug your shoulders and keep jammin' because, yeah, I do smile when I see you cry! Hah!
At first when I see you cry
It makes me smile
Yeah, it makes me smile
At first I feel bad for a while
But then I just smile
I go ahead and smile
11. Stop Wondering - April Smith and the Great Picture Show Sometimes after someone betrays you or screws you over or hurts you it helps to be petty for a little while. You'll never get judgment from me on that, for sure. Throw out some psychological f-yous, like this song, even. Don't be shy! Go ahead-- I'll look the other way.
Do you ever wonder if I'm thinking of you
When I wake in the morning and the day is new?
If you ever wonder if I'm thinking of you
Well, I'm not, so you can stop wondering
I've got better things to do
Than sit around thinking about you
And hanging on to every little word that you said
Again, the entire playlist can be found here!
Happy trimming the (toxic, negative, rude) fat.
The Weekly Playlist is going to be a little different this week. For one thing, I didn't pick any of the songs. For another thing, I outsourced that job to random strange boys on Tinder.
I recently decided that Tinder isn;t really for me. But at the same time, it's sort of an amazing study of human behavior, and, more than that, it's an easy way for a shy person to get perspectives from people you would've never met otherwise.
With these benefits of Tinder in mind, I decided a couple of days ago that I'd try to use Tinder for another purpose than finding "the one." (I find it hilarious that I thought maybe it could happen. I guess maybe it could. I'm too young to be thinking like this. What is wrong with me.)
In my bio (a feature that anyone Tinder-ing can get to from my pictures), I wrote "Tell me your favorite song-- I'll listen to it and tell you what I think!" I expected maybe a couple responses over the next few months. Instead, I immediately got a message containing a song title and the name of an artist that I didn't recognize.
You guys. It worked.
I got a freaking ton of responses. To be honest, I haven't listened to them all, and I certainly haven't provided my feedback on them all. I'm only human, okay?
I'm a little overwhelmed by how many straight boys in my area jumped on the opportunity to tell me their favorite song. (I also get a lot of Tinder boys telling me that they read and liked some of my blog, so if you're reading this and we also matched on Tinder-- hi. This is a little awkward, huh?)
Without further ado, here's some of the songs that were recommended to me by Tinder boys (and yet it's still twice the size of my usual playlists). I recommend listening to this playlist while you swipe left, right, or chat up some strangers.
The entire playlist can be found in its hour-long glory here.
1. It’s a Wonderful Life – Bandits of the Acoustic Revolution
Once again I wake up alone on the wrong side of my bed
And once again you begin your dancing nakedly on the right side of my head
It's for a lack of better words that I can hardly speak my soul
And I'm feeling what I'm feeling when I'm feeling when it's time to lose control, my love
2. The Waiting – Angel Olsen
Here you come along
I take a breath and remind myself that I too can be strong
Thought I was cool, turns out I'm a fool
Clearly you've proved me wrong
3. Life Itself – Glass Animal
Daddy was dumb, said that I'd be something special
Brought me up tough but I was a gentle human
Said that he loved each of my two million freckles
When I grew up, I was gonna be a superstar
4. The Pod – Hum
Morning scatters in and I am steady like a drug feeling out this one
She wakes up smashed as hell and steadies her ass against the rail
And bends before the pounding rain
She had the widest bright ideas all along about my love
5. Left And Leaving – The Weakerthans
My city's still breathing (but barely it's true)
Through buildings gone missing like teeth
The sidewalks are watching me think about you
Sparkled with broken glass
I'm back with scars to show
Back with the streets I know
6. Kinetic – Osker
Through the strength of your arms, I realized I was off the mark
All I really wanted was a pair of interested ears
I learned that for every pause, I was almost guaranteed more time to speak
It's always the selfish who say that life is way too short
7. Day By Day – Dirty Heads
All hyped up, ready to begin
Styrofoam emcees keep crumbling
Dirty Heads stay tight couldn't loosen with a wrench
These rivers run deep, Mariano trench
8. Scar Tissue – Red Hot Chili Peppers
Push me up against the wall
Young Kentucky girl in a push-up bra
Fallin' all over myself
To lick your heart and taste your health 'cause
With the bird I'll share this lonely view
9. I’m Serious, I’m Sorry – Jeff Rosenstock
I wanted to tell you I know how it feels when
The people you love just start disappearing
Ashamed that you took their presence for granted
But I didn't want to seem condescending
10. Weightless – Marconi Union
This is an instrumental song, don't worry about it though
I'm still writing out my own little lyrics
So that the post looks more complete and thorough
11. Simplicity Demand – Mercernary
You have to believe me
I want you to be near
I'm all alone here
Feeling fragile and confused
But your absence will make me choose
And the tailors of time have
Washed away my friend
12. Learning to Fly – Pink Floyd
Ice is forming on the lips of my wings
Unheeded warnings I thought I thought of everything
No navigator to guide my way home
Unladened, empty and turned to stone
13. Within Destruction – As I Lay Dying
If music is a mirror revealing
The depths of my heart
Then I will write the darkest song
For without forgiveness
My soul is lost
Once again, all of the tracks (in order) can be found and listened to here.
It’s probably been a pretty hard year for everybody. I sort of feel bad for the people who’ve actually had a good year, because now it’s like they can’t even talk about it or everyone’s just going to think they’re bragging.
No matter what your year has been like, we can’t skip the holidays just this once, so we might as well surrender ourselves to holiday spirit and try to end this shitshow of a year on a high note.
Try to get back into the holiday spirit here.
1.Green Trees Red Hearts – Nat Jay Sure, time is just a human construct, and the holiday season/the new year don’t really mean anything—by that I mean, we don’t really need to wait till the new year to “start over” or work on those resolutions. But I, for one, need a little holiday symbolism to get motivated after the shitshow of a year I’ve had, so I’m all about 2017 being a new start.
I’ve had some trouble fitting in
But I’ve been a stand up, stand up citizen
Thank god for green trees and red hearts
New years and new starts
2.Yule Shoot Your Eye Out – Fall Out Boy Gotta love a Christmas song that totally subverts the conventional spirit of the holiday. Generosity? Blah. Love? Meh. Gratitude? Whatever.
Don’t come home for Christmas
You’re the last thing I want to see
Underneath the tree
Merry Christmas, I could care less
3.Present Without A Bow – Kacey Musgraves I really like the analogy “me without you is like a present without a bow” because it implies that even without her boyfriend or whatever, the narrator is still a goddamn present. The bow is totally unnecessary. It’s just a superfluous little goodie. That’s how we should all be thinking of dumb boys, in my humble opinion.
The holiday’s just another day that’s cold
Standing all alone under the mistletoe
I don’t feel the cheer without you here
There’s no red and white stripes on a candy cane
Silent Night just wouldn’t sound the same
Where’d the magic go?
All I know is me without you is like a present without a bow
4.Christmas in Harlem – Kanye West, Prince Cy Hi, Teyana Taylor I have this weird intuition that this song is going to become to next “Silver Bells.” I can’t explain it. It’s just a feeling I have.
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night
Now we all livin’ the good life
Yeah, though it’s forty below the wind chill
And we wipin’ snow up off the windshield
It’s still, wonderful night to be alive, baby
5.Throw Another Log (On The Fire) – Chic Gamine All of these alone-for-Christmas songs are so much more relatable than the typical sleigh ride with your sweetheart stuff.
I hear the reindeers’ footsteps on the roof
And maybe it’s not real or maybe it’s proof
That I’m going crazy in this empty home
Sitting here waiting under the mistletoe
6.Christmas Must Be Tonight – Bahamas I think is kind of a Jesus song? I don’t know. Whatever. I like the way it sounds and the word Christmas is in the title so it fits.
Come down to the manger, see the little stranger
Wrapped in swaddling clothes, the prince of peace
The wheels start turning, torches start burning
And the whole wise men journey from the east
7.All My Christmases – Jillian Edwards This song reminds me of all the Hallmark and Lifetime romance Christmas movies that I freaking love. I know—they’re really cheesy. But I love them and I am who I am and I like this corny song, too, and I don’t care what you think of me.
And now every Christmas from now on I’ll be here, by your side
And now every day in between and for all of our lives
I’ll be waiting under the mistletoe wanting a kiss from you
You know I do, I do, I do
From now on, all my Christmases with you
8.Mistletoe – Colbie Caillat I think that this one is a little better known than the others, but still. We can’t judge something for being popular, that would be, like, uncool of us.
It’s not Christmas if the snow don’t fall
And I’m still standing here, three feet small
Lose our troubles because after all, it’s Christmas time
It’s Christmas time
9.Christmas Wrapping – The Waitresses This is in the same league as those super cheesy romantic holiday movies. It’s pretty long, and there’s a lot of build up, but the ending is hilariously satisfying. If you can’t wait through all of the repetition, just skip ahead to the end, I won’t tell on you.
Calendar picture, frozen landscape,
Chill this room for twenty-four days
Evergreens, sparkling snow
Get this winter over with!
Am I the only person who really detests “Monster Mash?” Why is this seemingly my only Halloween listening option? What is the appeal there?!
This year, I decided to stop complaining about “Monster Mash” and instead be a little more creative with my smooth Hallow-listening. This playlist, running at about a half an hour as per usual, is delightfully creepy (and eclectic, of course).
Though most of these songs may be familiar, they aren’t your typical October favorites. Whether this is your second, third, or hundredth listen to some of these classics, the spook and fright of this Halloween night might make them just a bit more ghostly.
Creep on over to the entire playlist here.
1.Zombie – The Cranberries Nothing like a song about the continuous violence in Northern Ireland to put the fear of the night in you.
In your head, in your head
Zombie, zombie, zombie
What’s in your head, in your head
Zombie, zombie, zombie
2.Psycho Killer – Talking Heads A serial killer?! And random French?! In the same?! Song?! True horror.
Qu’est-ce que c’est
Run run run run run run run away
3.Jack’s Lament – The All-American Rejects I love this version of the song from Nightmare Before Christmas. Spooks have feelings, too!
I'm a master of fright, and a demon of light
And I'll scare you right out of your pants
To a guy in Kentucky, I'm Mister Unlucky
And I'm known throughout England and France
And since I am dead, I can take off my head
To recite Shakespearean quotations
No animal nor man can scream like I can
With the fury of my recitations
But who here would ever understand
That the Pumpkin King with the skeleton grin
Would tire of his crown, if they only understood
He'd give it all up if he only could
4.I Put a Spell on You – The Animals This one is for all my bad witches.
I put a spell on you
Because you’re mine
5.Spooky – Dusty Springfield Have you ever fallen deeply for the ghost that haunts your attic? No? Yeah, totally, me neither.
Love is kinda crazy with a spooky little boy like you
6.People Are Strange – The Doors This was my favorite song in the eighth grade. What does that tell you about my middle school persona?
People are strange when you’re a strange
Faces look ugly when you’re alone
Women seem wicked when you’re unwanted
Streets are uneven when you’re down
7.Disturbia – Rihanna A more recent Halloween classic, I like to think of Disturbia as Rihanna’s modern response to FDR’s renowned quote, “The only thing to fear is fear itself.”
It’s a thief in the night
To come and grab you
It can creep up inside you
And consume you
A disease of the mind
It can control you
It’s too close to comfort
8.Superstition – Stevie Wonder Because Halloween makes old superstitious grannies of us all.
Very superstitious, writings on the wall
Very superstitious, ladders ‘bout to fall
Thirteen month old baby, broke the lookin’ glass
Seven years of bad luck, the good things in your past
9.Bad Things – Jace Everett I got this song from the theme of one of my favorite guilty pleasure shows, the always-wacky True Blood. This song will definitely get you into the falling-for-a-ghost mood (but as we already discussed that definitely never happens to sane normal people).
When you came in the air went out
And every shadow filled up with doubt
I don’t know who you think you are
But before the night is through
I wanna do bad things with you
In case you got too scared the first time, once again the mix is available for listening here.
Sometimes, you just have to let the misery ride out.
My mom has been telling me this one particular metaphor for a long time. I have no idea if she made it up or not. She is sort of the queen of uncommon clichés (which is a bit of an oxymoron in its own right).
When something awful is going on, or you’ve got extensive internal pain about something or other, and whenever the residual icky-ness hits you, as it is wont to do, once or twice or a thousand times a day, it helps to think of the pain as though it’s a wave.
Personally, I am deathly afraid of waves. I live on an island. And I am still very, very afraid of waves. When you’re swimming in the Atlantic, to avoid the little waves crashing against your chest, you have to go fairly far out into the ocean. It seems relatively peaceful out there, where the water is still and blue.
However. Going far out into the water does not allow you to avoid all waves. In fact, it makes you susceptible to the biggest, scariest, most powerful ones. And, it you’re far enough out that you can’t freaking run back to the beach when these awful King Kong waves start building! I hate this! I feel very strongly about it!
Of course, being the wimp that I am, I try running back to the sand anyway. This always just ends up with me tumbling under the water, fearing my life and choking on salt water, until I’m in the shower that night trying to get sand out of deep crevices.
So, according to the metaphor and my own traumatic experiences, running away from the pain wave is not really the best way to deal.
If you’re an experienced ocean swimmer, or just not a coward like me, you know that the best way to get through a huge wave is to literally go through it. Just hold your breath, and dive in. It makes no sense to me, and it really goes against both my fight and my flight instincts. But somehow, you always end up on the other side, breathing just fine.
Is this metaphor a little too obvious? Oh, whatever. Here’s a thirty-minute mix (and, yes, it is very eclectic, as per usual) to get you a little wet and maybe, by letting yourself feel the pain, get through it.
Find the entire playlist here!
1.Where Does the Good Go – Tegan and Sara It's not a secret that life is unfair. That little tidbit of life hasn't exactly been inconspicuous. But man, universe, don't leave us hanging like this. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction, or so I've heard in movies. If the misery is here, where's the happiness?
Where do you go with your broken heart in tow
What do you do with the left over you
And how do you know when to let go
Where does the good go
2.Fuck Was I – Jenny Owen Youngs How often is it the case that you know you shouldn't do something, but you do it anyway? Yeah. Me too.
Skillet on the stove
It’s such a temptation
Maybe I’ll be the lucky one that doesn’t get burned
What the fuck was I thinking?
3.Same Changes – The Weepies Bring on the bleak.
And everyone says
This love will change you
Well I ask, does anything ever stay the same
No, no, no
Just same changes
4.Everything Is Embarrassing – Sky Ferreira I really love this artist, named Wayne White. He was the puppeteer for Peewee's Playhouse and did incredible work for a bunch of other things. He's famous for these word paintings he makes, where he paints phrases that come to his wacky and wonderful mind on top of thrift store purchases. One of my favorites: "BEAUTY IS EMBARRASSING." And it's true. I'm embarrassed by so many qualities my mother would brag about to distant relatives.
I’ve been hating everything
Everything that could’ve been
Could have been my anything
Now everything’s embarrassing
5.Both Sides Now – Joni Mitchell This song is what happens when you've tried, you've looked at something from all perspectives, you've hung on for as long as you could, and yet everything still sucks.
But now they only block the sun
They rain and snow on everyone
So many things I would have done
But clouds got in my way
6.Crazy – Patsy Cline I hate feeling "crazy," especially because I'm only ever "crazy" in the eyes of someone else, someone who doesn't have the same stakes as I do. Ugh. Stop calling people crazy, everyone. It is uncool.
I’m crazy for feeling so lonely
I’m crazy for feeling so blue
7.Ain’t That Just The Way – Latricia McNeal Even though all of these songs aren't explicitly uplifting, just the fact that someone else felt the same as you do now is a huge relief.
Ain’t that just the way that life goes down, down, down, down
Moving way too fast or much too slow
Getting up, getting high, getting down
Getting no, no, nowhere
But not getting into someone I should know
8.I Care – Beyoncé This song has gotten me through many an emotional breakdown. Who am I kidding, it's gotten me through breakups, final exams in economics, and my favorite character dying in Buffy. It's multi-purpose. (Thank you, Lady Beyoncé, Duchess of Earth.)
Ain’t nobody tell me this is love
You’re immune to all my pain
I need you to tell me this is love
You don’t care well that’s okay
Well, I care
I know you don’t care too much
But I still care
Again, the mix, in it’s depressing entirety, can be listened to here.
Crushing out is like rocking out except it hurts way more.
As I missed posting a Weekly Playlist To last Monday, this week’s mix, at a full hour long, is double the eclectic. I picked each song to represent both the breathless excitement and the agonizing pain of having a dumb stupid crush on somebody or on somebodies.
Though having a crush is usually a bit of a tragedy, all we can do (besides actually initiate something with the crush-ee, which, well—no thanks) is enjoy the process. At the end of the day, it is kind of fun. Even the agonizing bits. I might just be a drama queen, though.
Take a listen to the full playlist here!
1.My Hands are Shaking – Sondre Lerche I shake when I haven't eaten enough. Also, when I am talking to someone I like. Also, when I'm nervous about anything. Sometimes I shake for no reason. I just have shaky hands.
My hands are shaking
From carrying this torch
From carrying this torch for you
2.Girl Crush – Little Big Town There's often more than two people involved in the tragedy of a crush: you, the person you're crushing on, and the person that the person you're crushing on is actually crushing on. It is a tense dynamic often resulting in irrational hatred and rational jealousy towards the third party, captured perfectly by Little Big Town.
I don’t get no sleep, I don’t get no peace
Thinkin’ about her under your bed sheets
The way that she’s whisperin’, the way that she’s pullin’ you in
Lord knows I’ve tried, I can’t get her off my mind
3.Untouchable Face – Ani DiFranco It doesn't matter how old I get. I will always feel like my crush has no idea who I am.
So fuck you
And your untouchable face
For existing in the first place
And who am I, that I should be vying for your touch
Who am I, bet you can’t even tell me that much
4.All Shook Up – Avila This version of the classic song "All Shook Up" is hauntingly beautiful, like all of my fantasies-- which involve my crush and I featured in a rom-com montage of us exploring a retro Haunted House ride at a funky pop-up carnival. Just me? 'Kay.
My tongue gets tied when I try to speak
My insides shake and there’s no relief
There’s only one cure for this body of mine
That’s love like yours, that’s love so fine
5.Dandelion – Kacey Musgraves I make wishes at 11:11, I make wishes on shooting stars, I make wishes on birthday candles. None of this shit has ever worked.
A million little wishes float across the sky
But it’s just a waste of breath and a waste of time, I know
‘Cause just like him, you always leave me crying
6.Why Can’t I? – Liz Phair This one is a little bit of a loose interpretation because the narrator in the song has clearly already snagged her crush. However, the feeling are quite the same. I would relate the symptoms to those of a heart attack. Like a cardiovascular thing, not a cute metaphor.
Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you
Why can’t I speak whenever I talk about you
It’s inevitable, it’s a fact that we’re gonna get down to it
So tell me
Why can’t I breathe whenever I think about you
7.Wedding Bell Blues – The 5th Dimension Another loose interpretation, as the narrator is with Bill, the man of her dreams. And yet! He won't marry her. Come on. That must be agony.
I love you so, I always will
And though devotion rules my heart I take no bows
But Bill, you’re never gonna take those wedding vows
8.Stone Cold – Demi Lovato I've been on a real Demi kick lately. Something about this song, especially the part where she pretends to play on her phone so that she seems cool and busy in the same room as her ex and his new fling, is very relatable.
I’ll take the pain
Give me the truth
Me and my heart
We’ll make it through
9.Our Hearts Are Wrong – Jessica Lea Mayfield I have liked people that are no good for me. Sometimes, I have done worse than like them, like care about them. Sometimes, my heart is just not my friend.
I know how you work
I am just like you
No matter what you say
Our hearts are wrong
Our hearts are wrong
10.You Don’t Know Me – Jann Arden This one once again brings to mind the "my crush will never know who I am" phenomenon.
No you don’t know the one, who dreams of you at night
And longs to kiss your lips, longs to hold you tight
Oh, I am just a friend, that’s all I’ve ever been
‘Cause you don’t know me
11.You, Sailor – Erin McKeown Now that I have put this into the playlist I'm not really sure why I did. Oh well, it's here now.
You, sailor, on the lonely sea
Will you turn and promise me
You’ll always be alive
Oh, I might stutter, I might falter
Sail uncharted waters
Drowning, lost, then found
12.Poison & Wine – The Civil Wars This song should be the theme song for the next inevitable opposites-attract Hollywood rom-com. It's so hateful and hot all the same time. Again, probably not good for me.
I wish you’d hold me when I turn my back
The less I give, the more I get back
Oh, your hands can heal, your hands can bruise
I don’t have a choice but I still choose you
Oh, I don’t love you, but I always will
13.Habits (Stay High) – Tove Lo I've heard this song on the radio so many times. I can't believe I don't hate it already.
Spend my days locked in a haze
Trying to forget you babe
I fall back down
I gotta stay high all my life to forget I’m missing you
14.Sister Wife – Alex Winston This is another weird playlist choice. Oh, whatever, I think this song is hilarious.
Hey there sister wife
Get the hell out, it’s my night
You don’t know the way to his heart
Like I do
15.Baby It’s You – The Shirelles Crying over someone, being convinced that they're your soulmate but they haven't realized it yet, blah blah join the club.
Oh, oh, many, many nights roll by
I sit alone at home and cry over you
What can I do?
I can’t help myself
‘Cause baby, it’s you
16.Lay Me Down – Sam Smith I mostly chose this song because Sam Smith makes me move like a classically trained violinist-- very jerky and awkward but I'm just feeling it so much I don't even care.
One day I will be, where I was
Right there, right next to you
And it’s hard, the days just seem so dark
The moon, the stars, they’re nothing without you
Your touch, your skin, where do I begin?
No words can explain the way I’m missing you
17.Sway – Bic Runga Bic Runga is one of my all-time favorite artists. I may need to do a playlist of just her songs because that is how obsessed I currently am. Take a listen to her soft, smooth voice, and get lost in how gorgeous she makes crushing on someone sound.
Don’t ever go away
I should be much too smart for this
You know it gets the better of me
When you and I collide
I fall into an ocean of you
Pull me out in time
Don’t let me drown
Again, all of the songs can be found here for your crushing out pleasure.
I have to be honest. Taking classes in France while simultaneously running this blog has not been that successful.
I feel terrible when I miss class, or when I don’t post for a while. Like, I feel physically and emotionally terrible. Yes, I am a perfectionist. I always have been. And I’m learning to recognize my boundaries, and not hate myself for sticking to ‘em. But sometimes it just sucks and I don’t do what I want to do or I judge myself for doing what I actually want to do and then I feel bad and then because I feel bad I don’t do what I want to do.
Along with being a perfectionist, I have a stubborn personality. It’s a winning combination that leaves me constantly in stalemates with myself. This past week, I’ve been at a definite impasse. I don’t feel well. Class can be quite boring. I’m tired of this same old city. I feel stuck. And because of all that, I don’t have the energy or willpower to change the situation, and potentially not feel those draining, damaging thoughts.
I’ve been in this exact same impasse before, many, many times. I noticed it only after several of its cycles. Admittedly, I have been noticing it for a long time without doing anything about it. Possibly I could end the standoff this time, or maybe not. As long as I don’t stop trying, I can deal with it.
Sometimes I do stop trying. (I’m trying to make myself realize that this not always a bad thing.) But I don’t want to, not right now.
If you find yourself in a similar situation, maybe this week’s (late) Weekly Playlist To might help. At the end of the day, at least we have these wildly eclectic thirty-minute mixes to rely on.
Find all of the tracks here.
1. The Tide Is High – Blondies Not giving up is literally in the lyrics here. Though this song seems to be about “getting the guy,” I replace “the guy” with all of my hopes, dreams, and goals and it really pumps me up.
The tide is high but I’m holding on
I’m gonna be your number one
I’m not the kind of girl who gives up just like that
2.Bad Self Portraits – Lake Street Dive Sometimes, you gotta get resourceful. My mother always says, “If you can’t change something, change the way you think about it.” The narrator’s camera could’ve easily been a memory, gathering dust, of lost love, but instead she turned it into a tool for furthering her own skills and creativity.
I bought this camera
To take pictures of my love
Now that he’s gone
I don’t have anybody to take pictures of
Along some highway is pretty good subjects
I’m gonna make myself make use of this thing
I’m taking landscapes
I’m taking still lifes
I’m taking bad self portraits
Of a lonely woman
3. Closer – Chic Gamine The more I think about it, the more I think that it’s actually terribly difficult to completely give up. Truly giving up on something you care about requires stripping away so much of what you are. I guess there’s a giving-up-spectrum. Taking a break isn’t giving up; that would fall on one side of spectrum. Forgetting your heart, however—that would fall on the opposite side.
And the moon rise and the sun still sets
But don’t forget your heart here
Don’t forget your heart here
4. One More Time With Feeling – Regina Spektor As someone who often forgets to breathe in moments of great tension, or even just moments of boredom, or happiness, or like at any time really, the idea that breathing is just a rhythm is quite comforting. As readers already know, I’m not all about meditation, but slow, measured breathing is a great way to calm down and get perspective.
One more time with feeling
Try it again
Breathing’s just a rhythm
Say it in your mind
Until you know that the words are right
5. They Can’t Take That Away From Me – Ella Fitzgerald, Louis Armstrong I just really love this song. It’s one of those “Forever Favorites,” if you know what I mean. And also, no, they can’t take anything away from me. In fact, screw they.
The way you wear your hat
The way you sip your tea
The memory of all that
No, they can’t take that away from me
The way your smile just beams
The way you sing off key
The way you haunt my dreams
No, no, they can’t take that away from me
6. Don’t Dream It’s Over – Sixpence None The Richer This song displays another case of defiance against the mysterious but oppressive they.
Hey now, hey now
Don’t dream it’s over
Hey now, hey now
When the world comes in
They come, they come
To build a wall between us
We know that they won’t win
7. Everybody Plays the Fool – The Main Ingredient This song has so many practical uses. Failed a test? Everybody plays the fool, sometimes. Heartbroken? Everybody plays the fool, sometimes. Dropped a bottle of Chanel perfume on the floor where it shattered into a million pieces in the middle of a fancy French perfume store? Everybody plays the fool, sometimes.
Everybody plays the fool, sometimes
They use your heart just like a tool
Listen, baby, it may be factual, may be cruel
I ain’t lyin’, everybody plays the fool
8. Put Your Records On – Corinne Bailey Rae This classic speaks for itself.
Girl, put your records on, tell me your favorite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Sapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,
Just go ahead, let your hair down
You’re gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow
9. Extraordinary Machine – Fiona Apple I love the idea of making the most out of utter crap. If only I had been able to think this way in the middle school/high school era.
If there was a better way to go
Then it would find me
I can’t help if the road
Just rolls out behind me
Be kind to me, or treat me mean
I’ll make the most of it
I’m an extraordinary machine
Again, the full mix can be found here for not-giving-up vibes.
Happy hanging in there.
Lately, it’s almost as though the universe doesn’t care about my individual comfort level like at all.
(It doesn’t. Like at all.)
I’ve been living in a new house, with different people, in an unfamiliar city, speaking a foreign tongue, for two weeks now. It gets easier, but only very slowly. Forcing heightened comfort only leaves you worse off: more unsure, more frustrated, and more lonely. No matter how much I study my French, my mind will always blank on me for a moment at restaurants; no matter how much I learn the streets and monuments, my feet will always lead me to a new place. This doesn’t mean that I should stop trying to be at home here, but maybe I should think about it differently.
This thirty-minute playlist is intended to help ease the transition and reveal the calming simplicity of life outside of your comfort zone. After all, you have to get a little lost in the first place to ever find your way. And I have gotten lost in this French city so many times, I must be getting close.
Take a listen here.
1.Simple & Sober – Mike + Ruthy Mike + Ruthy are a lovely husband-and-wife duo from the New York area. In this song, Ruthy sings the sweet sound of acceptance, of viewing the hard work required to be truly happy with positive willingness instead of resigned reluctance.
Simple and sober
I’ve gotten over
Screaming and screeching wheels
I’m keeping my own nose to the grindstone
I like the way it feels
2.Learn How to Fall – Paul Simon Paul Simon has this incredible ability to meld poetry with actual depth and musicality in a way that never seems clichéd. Take Learn How to Fall, for example: if it weren’t in Simon’s voice, I would half expect these lyrics to be found on a Hallmark card. And I wouldn’t allow them to move me so profoundly, either.
You got to drift in the breeze
Before you set your sails
It’s an occupation where the wind prevails
Before you set your sails
Drift in the breeze
3.Love Will Find Me – Little Jackie This is the second Little Jackie song I have put on a Weekly Playlist To, and it will probably not be the last (if we’re all that lucky). I agonize over “starting my real life!!!” all the time. Having a stable career, finding a life partner, achieving happiness… not only do those things not equate to a “real life,” they’re all part of a long process that can wait for a while yet. My mind is so much more at peace when I remember that these things will find me, eventually.
My life thus far has been held together by band-aids and safety pins
Nothing quite fits but I’m still trying to squeeze my body into it
I’ve been frontin’, I’ve been wanting someone who fits me effortlessly
With ease and room to spare, ‘cause I’ve endured some wear and tear
With all these meaningless love affairs, fake smiles and dishonest laughter
Fast forward to the morning after, I’m all dolled up looking like a disaster
I just want to wash off the lipstick, take off the stilettos
Play my music and get with my own flow
And love will find me eventually
4.Everybody’s Talkin’ – Harry Nilsson I often feel like a plankton, floating amongst crowds and voices, no agency in my own movements, reacting and responding to things that other people have done and said. I’ve always interpreted this song as someone tuning out those external influences and going where they feel they belong, regardless of who talks, stops, or stares.
I’m going where the sun keeps shining
Through the pouring rain
Going where the weather suits my clothes
Backing off of the north east wind,
Sailing on a summer breeze
And skipping over the ocean like a stone
5.The Rainbow Connection – Kermit the Frog Fair warning: for some reason, this song is a bit of a tearjerker. Or that might just be me. One day, those of us who always try to find the silver lining, who have imagined the fantasies and tried to create them but maybe failed once or twice—we will reach our hands out to a rainbow and feel something solid for the first time.
Why are there so many songs about rainbows
And what’s on the other side
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions
And rainbows have nothing to hide
So we’ve been told and some choose to believe it
I know they’re wrong, wait and see
Someday we’ll find it
The rainbow connection
The lovers, the dreamers, and me
6.Chinese Translation – M. Ward Something about the cyclical nature of this song is both a source of stress and a relief. A source of stress, because everyone has asked these same hard questions; and a relief, because everyone has asked these same hard questions.
And I said, what do you do with the pieces of a broken heart?
And how can a man like me remain in the light?
And if life is really as short as they say
Then why is the night so long?
And then the sun went down
And he played for me this song
7.Come Rain Or Come Shine – Ray Charles I’m with you, dear (though few) readers. Come rain or come shine.
Days may be cloudy or sunny
We’re in or we’re out of the money
But I’m with you always
I’m with you rain or shine
8.You Can Close Your Eyes – James Taylor
So close your eyes, you can close your eyes, it’s all right
I don’t know no love songs, and I can’t sing the blues anymore
But I can sing this song, and you can sing this song when I’m gone
It won’t be long before another day
We’re gonna have a good time
And no one’s gonna take that time away
You can stay as long as you like
9.Simple As This – Jake Bugg After reading a book called The Tao of Pooh, I became quite fascinated and simultaneously really convinced by Taoism, an ancient Chinese philosophy. There’s one Taoist concept that really resonated with me, called pu, a word that is translated to “the uncarved block.” The idea here is that something’s original essence, unfettered and unchanged, contains a natural power, a beauty which often trumps that of something more complicated. Often, once you strip away unnecessary elements and disregard what is actually unimportant, you will find the answers in the simplest form.
Tried liberation of my own free will
But it left me looking to get higher still.
Oh and the answer well who would have guessed
Could be something as simple as this
God knows how I could have missed
Something as simple as this
Again, this super zen mix can be found here.
Happy easy listenin’/livin’.
Contrary to popular belief, being a bitch is so not a bad thing.
In this totally blah male-dominated society, it often feels as though you’re either perceived as the housewife, quiet and submissive, or the mega-bitch, bossy and unreasonable. For both of these ridiculous labels, you might even be called—ugh, cringe--crazy. Often in response to entirely rational, sensible behavior.
I am done with all that. I’m done worrying; I’m done not being assertive for fear of seeming “rude.” I am taking charge, I am going for what I want, and I am going to enjoy it.
Therefore, I am happy to share with you this even-more-eclectic-than-usual thirty-minute track, full of songs to help you embrace your inner bitch from the voices of bad-ass bitches.
Listen to the playlist here!
1.Hard Out Here – Lily Allen This track gave us a line that, once it catches on, will truly mark the end of an era and the beginning of a better, wiser time: "grow a pair of tits." I will soon be making and distributing shirts to expedite to process.
There’s a glass ceiling to break, there’s money to make
And now it’s time to speed it up ‘cause I can’t move at this pace
Sometimes it’s hard to find the words to say
I’ll go ahead and say them anyway
Forget your balls and grow a pair of tits
It’s hard, it’s hard, it’s hard out here for a bitch
2.Bitch – Meredith Brooks Womanhood is not black or white, like literally everything else in the universe.
I’m a bitch, I’m a mother, I’m a child, I’m a lover
I’m a sinner, I’m a saint, I do not feel ashamed
I’m your hell, I’m your dream, I’m nothing in between
You know you wouldn’t want it any other way
So take me as I am
This may mean you’ll have to be a stronger man
3.Feeling Myself – Nicki Minaj, Beyoncé I am a huge fan of whatever happens when these two get together. Grab a cool friend, eat some cheeseburgers, and just feel whoever the heck you are.
I stopped the world
Male or female, it make no difference
I stopped the world
4.There She Goes – Sixpence None The Richer I like to listen to this song whenever I'm going somewhere because it's just one of those songs that makes you feel like you're in a movie. Like, yes, I do go there.
There she goes
There she goes again
Pulsing through my veings
And I just can’t contain
The feeling that remains
5.Confident – Demi Lovato Post-Disney Channel Demi Lovato is such a boss bitch. This song exemplifies so much of what I struggle with. I always think I need to check myself for fear of seeming narcissistic, and yet everyone praises confidence as the key to happiness. So, screw it. What's wrong with being confident? Nothing.
I used to hold my freak back
Now I’m letting go
I make my own choice
Bitch, I run this show
So leave the lights on
No, you can’t make me behave
So you say I’m complicated
That I must be out of my mind
But you’ve had my underrated
What’s wrong with being, what’s wrong with being, what’s wrong with being confident?
6.Ex’s & Oh’s – Elle King Though being a heartbreaker isn't necessarily a great thing, it's a lot better than depriving yourself of choices and what you want.
I get high, and I love to get low
So the hearts keep breaking and the heads just roll
You know that’s how the story goes
One, two, three they’re gonna run back to me
‘Cause I’m the best baby that they never gotta keep
One, two, three they’re gonna run back to me
They always wanna come but they never wanna leave
7.Little Red Wagon – Miranda Lambert This may not be the best song musically, lyrically, or morally, but whatever, it's fun.
Oh, heaven help me
I’ve been sowing wildflower seeds
And chasing tumbleweeds
But that’s just who I be
And you’re just trying to slow this rolling stone
But I’m on to you, baby
So guess what?
You can’t ride in my little red wagon
8.Boss Ass Bitch – Pretty Talking All Fades (PTAF) A classic.
I’m a boss ass bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch, bitch, bitch
I’m a boss ass bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch, bitch, bitch
I’m a boss ass bitch, bitch, bitch, bitch
Bitch, bitch, bitch
I’m a boss ass bitch
9.You’re Blasé – Peggy Lee Here's a more unusual choice. Yes, there were birches in the early 20th century.
You’re deep, just like a chasm
You’ve no enthusiasm
You’re tired and uninspired
Your day is one of leisure
In which you search for pleasure
You’re bored when you’re adored
Keep dancing to the beat of your own empowerment here.
I’m flying into France in a couple of days.
I know. I know. I’m overjoyed, too. For those of us who are not going to Paris, however, I’ve compiled a thirty-minute getaway to help you feel like you’re having the time of your life, similar to the time of my life that I will soon be having (sorry, I’m feeling a little braggy).
Find a sweet potato fry, pretend to smoke it like a cigarette, and listen to the playlist here.
1.I Love Paris – Ella Fitzgerald Paris is the kind of place that inspires unconditional love.
Every time I look down on this timeless town
Whether blue or gray be her skies
Whether loud be her cheers or whether soft be her tears
More and more do I realize that
I love Paris
2.La Mer – Charlest Trenet My translation is either a little too literal on this one or this song is actually a bit stranger than I thought it was.
La mer (The sea)
Au ciel d'été confound (With the summer sky mixes)
Ses blancs moutons (Her white capped sheep)
Avec les anges si purs (With the angels so pure)
La mer bergère d'azur (The sea, azure shepherdess,)
3.Formidable – Stromae This song is definitely better for dancing to than for lyric analysis. Take my word for it.
Formidable, formidable (Wonderful, wonderful)
Tu étais formidable, j'étais très pitoyable, (You were wonderful, I was so pitiful)
Nous étions formidables (We were wonderful)
4.Les Cornichons – Nino Ferrer Les cornichons are gherkins. This song lists a wide variety of delicious picnic foods of France, from baguettes, to brie, to chocolate and champagne, but, for who knows why, it is the gherkins that get all the credit.
Le poulet froid (Cold chicken)
La mayonnaise (Mayonnaise)
Le chocolat (Chocolate)
Les champignons (Mushrooms)
Les ouvre-boîtes (The can-opener)
Et les tomates (And tomatoes)
Les cornichons (Gherkins)
5.Moi Je Joue – Brigitte Bardot Perhaps another French song that isn’t known for its lyrics, though there is some fun wordplay (for example, joue means both "play" and "cheek").
Moi je joue (Me, I play)
Moi je joue à joue contre joue (Me, I play cheek to cheek)
Je veux jouer à joue contre vous (I want to play at cheek against you)
Mais vous, le voulez-vous? (But you, do you want it?)
De tout cœur (From all my heart)
Je veux gagner ce cœur à cœur (I want to win this heart to heart)
Vous connaissez mon jeu par cœur (You know my game by heart)
Alors défendez-vous (So defend yourself)
6.Quelqu’un M’a Dit – Carla Bruni This track is exceptionally beautiful, music and lyrics alike. Carla Bruni herself is a deeply interesting person, but let’s try not to hold it against her that there’s rumors that she once dated Donald Trump (but still, ew).
On me dit que nos vies (I’m told that our lives)
Ne valent pas grand-chose (Aren’t worth much)
Qu’elles passent en un instant (That they pass in an instant)
Comme fânent les roses, (Like wilting roses,)
On me dit que le temps (I’m told that time)
Qui glisse est un salaud, (That slips by is a bastard,)
Et que de nos chagrins (And that our sorrows)
Il s’en fait des manteaux (It makes into coats)
7.Michèle – Gerard Lenorman Michèle is a beautiful song about young love lost. I dare you to listen to this song and not fantasize about falling in love in France.
Un jour tu as eu dix-sept ans (One day you were 17 years old)
Tes cheveux volaient dans le vent (Your hair was flying in the wind)
Et souvent tu chantais: (And often you were singing:)
“Oh! Yesterday!” (“Oh! Yesterday!”)
Les jeudis après-midi (Thursdays in the afternoon)
On allait au cinéma gris (We used to go to the gray cinema)
Voir les films, de Marilyn (To see Marilyn’s films)
Michèle, un soir en décembre (Michele, one evening in December)
La neige tombait sur les toits (The snow was falling on the roofs)
Nous étions toi et moi (We were you and I)
Endormis ensemble (Falling asleep together)
Pour la première fois (For the first time)
8.La Javanaise – Serge Gainsbourg No one like Serge Gainsbourg can teach you about love. And French, since he enunciates so clearly. Also, this rare music video documents the purest nonchalance I have ever seen.
La vie ne vaut d’être vécue sans amour (Life is not worth living without love)
Mais c’est vous (But it is you)
Qui l’avez voulu mon amour (Who wanted it that way, my love)
Ne vous déplaise (Whether it pleases you or not)
En dansant la Javanaise (In dancing the Javanaise)
Nous nous aimions (We loved each other)
Le temps d’une chanson (For the length of a song)
9.Non, Je Ne Regrette Rien – Edith Piaf This is a song that could also fit in last week’s playlist, To Feel Good In Your Own Skin. Put it on, belt it out, and pretend that you don’t have any regrets for at least a few minutes.
Balayées les amours (Wiped away the romances)
Et tous leurs tremolos (And all their instabilites)
Balayés pour toujours (Swept away for eternity)
Je repars à zero (I restart at zero)
Non, rien de rien (No, nothing at all,)
Non, je ne regrette rien (No, I regret nothing)
Ni le bien qu’on m’a fait (Not the good things they did to me)
Ni le mal (Nor the bad)
Tout ça m’est bien égal (May as well be the same to me)
10.La Vie En Rose – Louis Armstrong La Vie En Rose is the quintessential French song. We’ve all heard it, coming out of music boxes and in subway cars. This version is in English, through the voice of celebrated American trumpeter, composer, and singer Louis Armstrong. Though the lyrics are somewhat different, the gist is the same. In France, just like in love, life is pink.
Hold me close and hold me fast
The magic spell you cat
This is la vie en rose
When you kiss me, heaven sighs
And though I close my eyes
I see la vie en rose
When you press me to your heart
I’m in a world apart
A world where roses bloom
And when you speak, angels sing from above
Every day words seem
To turn into love songs
Give your heart and soul to me
And life will always be
La vie en rose
Again, the mix can be found here for your “I don’t know what they’re saying but I dig it” listening enjoyment.
Heureux de tomber amoureux de Paris.
I would argue that it is a tenet of the human condition that no one wants to feel like they actually suck.
That’s why apologizing is such a chore for us. By truly saying that you’re sorry, for your actions and their effects, you are basically admitting, even for just a moment, that you suck. When everyone judges themselves by their intentions, and judges everyone else for their actions, it’s easy to call someone else a bad person but balk at being a bad person yourself.
It makes sense, really. It’s pride, and ego, and all of that other stuff that really falls under the umbrella of self-preservation. It’s respectable to have principles and morals and ethics and to be a stand-up Good Samaritan. We don’t see ourselves in Forever 21 dressing room mirrors. We see ourselves in the best light possible.
It’s how we get through the day. It’s how we deal with all of the crap that happens to us. I’m a good person, so all of this tragedy and bullshit is unfair. I’m a good person, so eventually there will be karmic retribution and the rollercoaster will go up, up, up, and good things will happen again.
I am just as guilty of this as everyone I know. Even with the armor of self-deprecation protecting me from labels like “conceited, “narcissistic,” and “egotistical,” I still think I’m awesome. I still think I’m deserving of Spontaneous Goodness, from the world and from my friends and from my actions.
Whether this is true or not, and I freely confess that it probably isn’t, most of the time this mind frame keeps me sane. When I think of myself with positivity, I tend to rise to the occasion. I think of myself as an altruistic, generous person, and I don’t want there to be proof of the opposite, so I’m spurred on to actually be altruistic and generous or whatever other good qualities the world is praising that day. Does that make the altruism and generosity fake? I don’t know, and I don’t really care, because I am convinced of my own good intentions and care for my fellow human beans.
Besides, every media source suggests Confidence™ as the end-all, be-all, yadda yadda. I guess some falsity is the trade-off from acquiring that confidence. Fake it till ya make it, am I right?
So apologizing totally topples all of that good confidence work we do. We spend precious time trying to persuade ourselves that we are special, that we are deserving and good, just for an instant of non-specialness and sometimes even cruelty to reverse it all. Apologizing is like that dreaded “GAME OVER” screen that brings us right back to the beginning.
But that’s why it’s so pivotal. It’s like nature’s version of checks and balances. When we get so beyond ourselves that we hurt someone else, we need to check our ego and balance our thoughts. It’s hard, but it’s necessary.
Being sorry is a lot more than two measly words. Regardless of the severity of the original transgression, apologizing is demonstrating proof of the importance of the relationship. This only makes it harder, unfortunately.
I am personally a lousy apologizer. I have a hard time separating my intentions from what actually happened. Even worse, as an over-thinker, I am able to immediately file through everything good that I’ve done for the individual I’ve hurt, effectively diminishing- at least to me- the crime of what I said or did. I’ve been hurt before. I know what it feels like. But I struggle to compare the people who have hurt me to myself.
That’s only when I’ve actually done something wrong, of course. When I’ve done nothing wrong, I’m great at apologizing. I’ll apologize to pieces of furniture that I accidentally bumped into. Sometimes I’ll even apologize for my existence, a sad trend that is gaining prevalence among my peers. A study by Harvard Business School concluded that, when a researcher began a request to use a stranger’s cell phone with a quick, unsolicited, and unrelated “I’m sorry,” the researcher was offered the phone 47 percent of the time as opposed to the 9 percent of the time the researcher didn’t use the magic words and wasn’t given the phone.
There’s a metaphor about the difficulties of human intimacy that I really love. It’s called the hedgehog’s dilemma, or sometimes the porcupine dilemma. In cold weather, hedgehogs seek others in order to share body heat. But because of their sharp spines, they must keep a safe distance. They want close relationships, but they can’t have the proximity that they desire for fear of hurting each other.
The philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer and the psychologist Sigmund Freud have both used this situation to describe the role of the individual in society. Despite goodwill, we can’t get too close to each other because it will create mutual harm and weaker relationships. Our quills just can’t help but poke each other.
A cute fun fact: When Freud came to the United States in 1919, he was adorably excited to see a porcupine, a native species there, and even said about his trip: “I am going to the USA to catch sight of a wild porcupine and to give some lectures.”
I guess the moral of the story is moderation. If we moderate our self-interest while simultaneously moderating our consideration for others, we might just end up floating in the happy medium. But we can only learn this after a few foibles, after a few wrongdoings and a few carefully constructed apologies—so don’t be too hard on yourself, okay?
I’m sick of love songs. Specifically, love songs about other people. Where’s all the glorious self-love?!
Well, some of it is right here on this page, in the form of another wildly eclectic Weekly Playlist To. These tracks will sing your praises, emphasizing the truth we all know but hate to admit-- that all you need is you. This thirty-minute mix is dedicated to everyone who knows that they are enough as they are, and to those who needed reminding (namely, everyone else).
Listen to the full playlist here.
1.The World Should Revolve Around Me – Little Jackie Little Jackie is one of the best artists to listen to when you’re feeling down. She’s confident yet self-deprecating, deeply meaningful yet hilarious. So, everything that I want to be when I grow up.
There’s only one me in the galaxy
I am an endangered species
This kind of flower don’t grown on Earth
Just lettin’ you know, for what it’s worth
2.I Like Giants – Kimya Dawson This song is rife with body positivity and mindfulness. If you’re like me and find meditation to be an activity that causes more anxiety, Kimya Dawson’s track is a great alternative.
I’m smaller than a poppy seed inside a great big bowl
And the ocean is a giant that can swallow me whole
So I swim for all salvation and I swim to save my soul
But my soul is just a whisper trapped inside a tornado
So I flip to my back and I float and I sing
I am grounded, I am humbled, I am one with everything
3.Dangerous Woman – Ariana Grande Who doesn’t want to feel dangerous every once in a while? Ariana Grande combines power and femininity here in a way that I really appreciate. "Girly" does not always equate to weak innocence, just as "masculine" does not always equate to formidable dominance.
Don’t need permission
Made my decision to test my limits
‘Cause it’s my business, God as my witness
Start what I finished
Don’t need no hold up
Taking control of this kind of moment
I’m locked and loaded
Completely focused, my mind is open
4.Brass in Pocket – Pretenders If you’re not convinced that this song will make you feel good about yourself, watch this video of Scarlett Johansson doing the karaoke version in Lost in Translation. You can totally do that, and be just as hot. Easily.
‘Cause I’m gonna make you see
There’s nobody else here, no one like me
I’m special, so special
I gotta have some of your attention
5.Kanye – The Chainsmokes, sirenXX I’m one of the few individuals in modern society who genuinely loves Kanye West. This song exemplifies why: he doesn’t care what anyone thinks, he does what he wants, and he loves himself more than anyone else in the past century has.
One day I’ll stand with a crown on my head
Like a God, yeah, like a God
With every step, no, I won’t second-guess what I want
I wanna be like Kanye
I’ll be the king of me always
Do what I want and have it my way
All day, like Kanye
6.She’s So High – Tal Bachman Celebrating yourself never means putting down other women. Rather, it involves being appreciative of all that you’ve got, and of all of the good that other women have, too, and not comparing yourself to them or being judgmental of yourself for being different.
She’s blood, flesh, and bone, no tucks or silicone
She’s touch, smell, taste, and sound…
‘Cause she’s so high, high above me, she’s so lovely
She’s so high, like Cleopatra, Joan of Arc, or Aphrodite
She’s so high, high above me
7.Ego – Beyoncé Beyoncé is incredible. This is a well-known fact. She doesn’t let anyone diminish her power and she doesn’t feel bad that she’s so awesome, so why should anyone else?
Some women were made
But me, myself?
I like to think that I was created
For a special purpose
What’s more special than you?
You feel me?
8.No Scrubs – TLC You know what has literally nothing to do with your self-worth? Boys. Or, more specifically, scrubs. But not even boys who aren’t scrubs. Basically, no other person determines your self-worth, but especially not boys.
I don’t want your number (no)
I don’t want to give you mine and (no)
I don’t want to meet you nowhere (no)
I don’t want none of your time (no)
9.Bette Davis Eyes – Kim Carnes Finishing the playlist off, this sultry single wants you to know just how much you are a movie star. And, you better believe it, 'cause you are a movie star.
She’s precocious, and she knows
Just what it takes to make a pro blush
She’s got Greta Garbo’s standoff sighs,
She’s got Bette Davis eyes
Again, the mix can be found here.
Happy feelin’ yourself.
For this week’s Playlist To, I’ve compiled a comically eclectic thirty-minute escape from the fresh hell we sometimes find ourselves in. Though partially inspired by the inimitable Dorothy Parker, who, according to John Keats, would quite seriously ask, “What fresh hell can this be?” whenever anyone rang her doorbell, this playlist was actually sent to me in a stress dream by the Muses of Fuck-Ups. This mix is dedicated to the lovely individuals out there who rang my doorbell this week, and to all those who rang yours, too.
Take a listen here.
1.Midnight Train to Georgia – Gladys Knight & The Pips I genuinely wish I could sell my hopes to the pawnshop like the man in this song does. Then I might actually get something out of them. Like a new pair of shoes. Or ice cream.
But he sure found out the hard way
That dreams don’t always come true
So he pawned all his hopes and even sold his old car
Bought a one-way ticket back to the life he once knew
2.Look at Miss Ohio – Gillian Welch This song is about what I want to do—escaping everything and eschewing my responsibilities—but would actually never do because I have an affliction and it’s called caring too much.
Oh me oh my oh, look at Miss Ohio
She’s running around with her ragtop down
She says, “I wanna do right, but not right now”
3.Life on Mars? – David Bowie For when your life disappoints you so you distract yourself with fantasy but the fantasy is disappointing, too.
Now she walks through her sunken dream
To the seat with the clearest view
And she’s hooked to the silver screen
But the film is a saddening bore
For she’s lived it ten times or more
4.Roman Holiday – Nicki Minaj I wish I could boast the lack of inhibitions that Minaj demonstrates in this classic chef-d'oeuvre. In fact, now that I think about it, I could probably use a Roman holiday from my inhibitions.
Take your medication, Roman
Take a short vacation, Roman
You’ll be okay
You need to know your station, Roman
Some alterations on your clothes and your brain
Take a little break, little break from your silencing
There’s so much you can take, you can take
I know how bad you need a Roman holiday
5.Jackson – Johnny Cash, June Carter Cash Goodbye.
When I breeze into that city, people gonna stoop and bow
All them women gonna make me teach ‘em what they don’t know how
I’m goin’ to Jackson, you turn-a loose-a my coat
Cuz I’m goin’ to Jackson
“Goodbye,” that’s all she wrote
6.Chicago – Sufjan Stevens There are a lot of beautiful lines that exemplify isolation and listlessness and wanderlust and frustration in this song, but I chose to feature the stanza that I most relate to.
I made a lot of mistakes
I made a lot of mistakes
I made a lot of mistakes
I made a lot of mistakes
7.I’m Not Gonna Miss You – Glen Campbell I didn’t realize until long after using this song as a post-breakup anthem that it’s not about takin’ out the trash but actually Campbell’s battle with Alzheimer’s. How’s that for a pick-me-up?
You’re the last person I will love
You’re the last face I will recall
And best of all
I’m not gonna miss you
8.Spaceship – Kanye West, GLC, Consequence As a big believer in an Emergency Kanye Dance Party at the end of each long, hard, day of hustling, I had to end this playlist with this hymn about becoming an astronaut when the minimum wage is getting you down.
I’ve been working this graveshfit
And I ain’t made shit
I wish I could
Buy me a spaceship and fly
Past the sky
Again, the full playlist can be found here.
Student. Writer. Everything-o-phile.